|When I first came to the internet in 1999, I used to hang out at a few forums set up for the 1996 Disney movie production of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. One day, when I was lurking about on the forum for Judge Claude Frollo, a member who went by the alias of "D" posted a parody of "Hellfire" in which she replaced one word in each line of the song with the word "pants." She encouraged others to try it on other songs and they usually turn out quite funny. It drew a good chuckle from many phantom fans when I applied the same formula to the ever-popular "Music of the Night."|
Night-time sharpens, heightens pants sensations.
Darkness stirs, and pants imagination.
Silently the senses abandon pants defenses.
Slowly, gently, night unfurls pants splendor...
Grasp pants, sense pants - tremulous and tender...
Turn your pants away from the garrish light of day,
Turn your pants away from cold unfeeling light -
and listen to the music of the pants.
Close your eyes and surrender to your darkest pants.
Purge your thoughts of the pants you knew before!
Close your eyes, let your pantsess
(*gollum*) start to sooooar!
And you'll live as pants never lived before...
Softly, deftly, music shall surround pants...
Feel pants, hear pants, closing in around you...
Open up your pants, let your fantasies unwind,
in this darkness which you know pants cannot fight -
the darkness of the music of the pants...
Let your mind start a journey to a strange pants world!
Leave all thoughts of the pants you knew before!
Let your pants take you where you long to beeee!
Only then can pants belong to me...
Floating, falling, pants intoxication!
Touch pants, feel pants, savor each sensation!
Let the dream begin, let your darker pants give in
to the power of the music that pants write -
The power of the music of the pants.
You alone can make my pants take flight.
Help me make the music of the pants...
|Disclaimer: No pants were harmed in the production of this parody.|